Dumbarton FC are stumbling into their next league match against Stranraer like a drunk into a kebab shop at 2 a.m.—hopeful, confused, and probably going to regret it. With just one win in their last 10 games (and even that looked like an administrative error), the Sons have been about as sturdy as a flatpack chair assembled blindfolded.

They’ve shipped 25 goals and scored only 11, most of those in one weirdly competent performance against Stenhousemuir, who were presumably distracted by a pigeon on the pitch. Dumbarton’s defence has more holes than a sponge in a gunfight, and their attack wouldn’t scare a toddler in shin pads.

Now they welcome Stranraer, a side surely licking their lips at the chance to face such obliging hosts. If DUM continue this form, SRA could play in slippers and still come away with three points and a souvenir pie.

What began as a season of unbridled triumph for Hibernian under the charismatic David Blair has mutated into a Shakespearean tragedy. Once perched loftily atop the league, Hibs now lurch forward like a wounded beast, crippled by a perfect storm of injuries, suspensions, and sheer anarchy.

The squad is in tatters. Goalkeeper Phil Slater valiantly mans the posts while Josef Bursik plays like a man possessed, but in front of them lies a defensive apocalypse. Rocky Bushiri languishes in suspension, Peter Marinello and Jerry Milton are doubtful, while Carl Kennedy teeters dangerously on the brink of disciplinary disaster.

Midfield? A wasteland. John Fraser and Ollie Dennis are banned, John Collins clings to form, while Jordan Orbita is being hailed as the lone glimmering emerald in a sea of despair. Up front, Jimmy O’Rourke limps, Christian Doidge groans, and Elie Youan’s fitness resembles a roulette wheel of fate. Meanwhile, suspended Kieron Bowie watches from the stands as his teammates flounder.

Blair now faces a locker room on the edge of mutiny, tabloids (like this one) baying for blood, and supporters oscillating between despair and delirium. This is not merely a slump — this is Easter Road, a full-blown soap opera. Annan and Dundee must be rubbing their hands together in glee.

When I was a lad BC lasted a long time......one Million years in fact.....which was about 2 hours long.