The silly rolls have ended, maybe ...

#41: FRA vs DEE 0-3

Dundee marched into Fraserburgh like polite guests who accidentally brought a wrecking ball. We opened the scoring early, because why wait for drama when Nicky Riley can tap one in after a casual stroll down the wing. Fraserburgh tried a few counterattacks, but our defenders treated them like mild inconveniences — the footballing equivalent of brushing lint off a jacket.
Fatello then arrived after halftime, scored immediately, and probably wondered why everyone else was sweating. Caniggia wrapped things up with a goal so smooth it should’ve come with a warning label.
Fraserburgh rotated goalkeepers like they were testing fire alarms, but nothing stopped the inevitable: DEE 3, FRA 0 — job done, thanks for hosting.

#42: DEE vs ARB 3-0

Dundee strolled to a 3–0 win over Arbroath, who kindly spent 90 minutes demonstrating why defending is optional. Josh Meekings opened the scoring after being subbed on for an injured teammate — a classic “accidental masterplan”. Javier Artero doubled the lead with a shot Ned Doig heroically got a fingertip to… before watching it go in anyway. Jesse Curran wrapped things up with a header that Arbroath’s defence observed from a respectful distance. A few offside calls tried to add drama, but even the officials couldn’t derail Dundee’s cruise. 
Man of the Match? Curran, obviously. Title race? Still very much alive.

PROGRESS!
After wasting last week's home match vs STE despite 3.0-0.7 xG, this week we've lost vs MOT despite only 2.2-1.3 xG.

#38: SRA vs DEE 1-6

We kindly allowed Stranraer their traditional one-minute moment of joy, before demonstrating what happens when you poke the Dens Park bear. Konrad equalised, Stanton took over like he owned the stadium, and Caniggia finished chances that physics would normally reject. Riley even added a polite penalty, because we believe in balanced scoring. 
By halftime it was 6–1, so we spent the second half practising our defensive yoga while Stranraer contemplated career changes. 
Man of the Match? Stanton, obviously — two goals, one limp, total domination. A comfortable day out, really.

#39: DEE vs MOT 0-1

Motherwell came to Dens Park with all the subtlety of a brick and still somehow walked away with a 1–0 win. We dominated the ball, the territory, and probably the moral high ground, yet conceded after Bondigas nodded in the only moment our defence collectively decided to take a tea break. 
Every Dundee chance was politely directed at Budinauckas, who apparently chose today to become prime Gianluigi Buffon. Two yellow cards for “simulation” rounded off the comedy, because nothing says entertainment like a strict ref with a flair for theatre. 
Final verdict: plenty of effort, zero goals, and a masterclass in how to lose a match we should never have lost.