One third of the season over - 2.7 PPG, all is well ...

Match #15: ARB vs DEE 1-5

Arbroath kindly hosted a goal-fest for Dundee FC, who graciously accepted with five delightful finishes. Kerr Waddell opened the scoring before the clock had a chance to warm up, followed by Meekings and Fatello, who apparently mistook the match for a shooting gallery. Caulker added a fourth just to be polite. Arbroath responded in the 69th minute - presumably to remind us they were still on the pitch. Man of the Match? Our keeper, Kostadin Gadzhalov, who spent the afternoon swatting away hopeful Arbroath attempts like flies at a picnic. Final score: 5–1. A generous donation to our goal difference fund. Thanks, lads.

Match #16: DUM vs DEE 1-2

Dundee FC bravely overcame the terrifying might of Dumbarton’s one-goal tsunami in a nail-biting 2–1 thriller. After surviving 14 shots on target (yes, fourteen), our heroic keeper Kostadin Gadzhalov single-handedly kept the laws of physics intact. Callum Shepherd briefly gave Dumbarton hope - how sweet. But Sam Stanton immediately reminded them who’s boss, and Josh Meekings sealed the deal with a header that defied gravity and logic. We generously allowed Dumbarton to dominate possession and stats, just to make it interesting. Man of the Match? Obviously Gadzhalov, who apparently moonlights as a brick wall. Another win, another day atop the table. You're welcome, Division 1.

2 matches against last season's top 2, 6 points, no worries.
En detail ...

Match #12: MOT vs DEE 0-1

Motherwell rolled out the red carpet, but forgot the goals. Dundee FC, ever the polite guests, waited 84 minutes before Josh Meekings finally broke the silence with a low drive that whispered “thanks for the hospitality.” Gadzhalov in goal played whack-a-mole with MOT’s timid attempts, while Konrad flirted with offside like it was prom night. VAR? Still a myth in SESL folklore. MOT’s “home advantage” was more of a decorative concept. Final score: 1–0 to the Blues, who now sit atop the table sipping tea and wondering if MOT ever planned to score or just host a midfield picnic.

Match #13: DEE vs FRA 4-0

Fraserburgh arrived with dreams, left with nightmares. Dundee FC politely waited until halftime before unleashing a four-goal symphony of humiliation. Nicky Riley scored twice in two minutes, Caulker added finesse, and Konrad sealed the deal with a header so casual it could’ve been a yawn. Umberto Fatello turned Lewandowski into a spectator, while Ter Stegen spent 90 minutes regretting his career choices. The referee was strict, but not strict enough to stop the carnage. Final score: 4–0. Fraserburgh might want to consider a new sport. Curling, perhaps?