Mixed emotions…

#25: BIB vs CN 2-0

From BIB’s point of view, the match felt pleasantly routine — the kind of calm afternoon you get when half your squad is the size of office buildings. We strolled to a 2–0 win over CN, who bravely attempted football despite spending most of the game trying not to be stepped on by Logi or accidentally vaporised by Mechagodzilla’s “mis-hit clearances.”

Ultraman Blu made his debut, shimmering with heroic confidence and only causing two minor tremors. Manning and Humbaba bullied the flanks like polite natural disasters, while Alexander Alex opened the scoring after navigating between three defenders who looked understandably terrified.

Navigating sealed it at 2–0, and we cruised home — another day, another victory, another stadium needing structural repairs.

#26: FCB vs BIB 4-0

Oh yes, fantastic performance from BIB. Truly groundbreaking. I mean, when you field Mechagodzilla, Logi, Humbaba, Manning, and two Ultramen, you naturally expect… zero shots. Visionary stuff. Why bother using your skyscraper‑sized players to, you know, play football, when they can instead stand around like confused tourist attractions?

And the defending — wow. Our giants escorting FCB attackers through the box like friendly tour guides was a bold artistic choice. Very avant‑garde.

But hey, at least Olsson prevented the scoreboard from needing scientific notation. Maybe next match we try something wild, like letting a mega‑sized player actually touch the ball.

Seismic turbulences!?

#22: BIB vs CPT 1-3

From the Monster Island stands, this match felt like a cosmic prank. We showed up ready to roar, but CPT apparently brought cheat codes. Two goals conceded before our giants had even finished adjusting their shin pads — delightful. Their keeper Krzak transformed into some kind of mythical forcefield, casually denying every shot we fired, as if saving was his weekend hobby.

Navigating’s goal gave us a brief flicker of hope, the emotional equivalent of finding a snack in an empty fridge. But CPT’s early strikes had already sunk us. By full time, frustration levels were volcanic, and the fanbase collectively sighed: “Classic BIB — dominating everything except the scoreboard.”

#23: CAM vs BIB 3-0

“Well, what can I say,” Coach Habermann sighed, looking like he aged three geological eras in ninety minutes. “We brought five giants to Camelot and somehow they all played like they were afraid of stepping on the grass. Humbaba tip‑toed, Logi flickered out, Mechagodzilla froze mid‑update, Ultraman posed more than he ran, and Manning kept shouting ‘protect the pocket’ at players who are literally the size of a pocket.”

He rubbed his temples. “Zero shots on target. Zero. At this point I’d celebrate a misplaced cross.”

Then he muttered the line every Monster Island fan now knows by heart:
“The future is mega… the present is migraine.”